First impressions that people have of you are important to how your relationship with them plays out. While not every first impression is perfect, trying your hardest to make yours the best they can be can define your relationships with the people you meet. It is important to be yourself, but being an elevated version of yourself might make the lasting impression that much better. VALLEY has compiled a few tricks to perfecting your first impressions.
Prepare Topics for Later
Part of what makes meeting someone for the first time so great is when you are riffing like you’ve known each other for years, but sometimes that isn’t how it feels. You might be comfortable sitting in silence with one of your long-time friends, but reaching a pause in the conversation with someone you just met can be the most awkward moment of your day.
To avoid this, always try to think of something new you can say in the event that you reach this pause. Things that you have in common are a great source of conversation, events that happened recently, or even asking them about their day are all safe options that can help fill the gap in conversation.
It’s Not Me, It’s You
People love to talk about themselves. You know yourself best, after all, so you are the easiest topic to drone on about. While humans have believed this for years, the National Library of Medicine published research in 2012 proving that disclosing information about oneself provides the same intrinsic value as food or sex. Gushing about your personal experiences, beliefs and values makes you feel happy at a scientific level.
Asking someone that you’re meeting about themselves can help them subconsciously create that positive association with you. This is also another strategy to avoid awkward silence since many people are able to talk about themselves for ages.
Mirror, Mirror
You might know it as mirroring, but science knows it as limbic synchrony. Limbic synchrony involves neurons in the brain known as mirror neurons which not only simulate actions but reflect feelings and intentions as well. Mirror neurons are triggered when you see somebody do some sort of expression — you then subconsciously place yourself in their shoes and take on their perceived beliefs and behaviors. While this is a subconscious action, you can also intentionally try to mirror your acquaintance.
Laughing with that person, using the same types of gestures as them and bringing the same energy to the conversation can make your new friend feel like they know you way better. Many people pick up on the mannerisms of the people they spend the most time with, so using that same logic you can make someone new feel more welcome. Just don’t replicate their every movement, or they might see what you’re trying to do.
First impressions are important in social and professional situations, so learning how to make yours better can make you stand out from the rest. Employing these strategies will set you up for a better relationship with someone who you’ve just met, even if they aren’t aware that you took the extra steps to do so.
Do you have any strategies to acing your first impression on others? Let VALLEY know by tagging us @VALLEYmag on Instagram!
