After a breakup with a significant other, we tend to reminisce on the details we will miss most. Rereading text messages. Taking a trip through your camera roll. Driving past your favorite date spots. The love in every detail cuts deeper than a knife. What comes next is a reality we must face eventually. Breakups can leave us feeling heavy-hearted, longing for what once was. But often, there’s a silver lining in moving on—freedom from the little things we didn’t realize were weighing us down. There will be moments you can’t relive, but who says we can’t celebrate what we’ve lost?
Truth is I can’t pretend it’s
Taylor Swift
Platonic, it’s just ended
Sharp As A Knife
In her vault song, “Now That We Don’t Talk” from 1989 (Taylor’s Version), Taylor Swift notes, “So I pay the price of what I lost and what it cost, now that we don’t talk.” Whether your breakup happened a month ago, a year ago, or it was just a situationship –– there is never a timeline to reevaluate what was lost. Toward the end of the song she says:
“I don’t have to pretend I like acid rock
Or that I’d like to be on a mega yacht
With important men who think important thoughts
Guess maybe I am better off
Now that we don’t talk”
The song is a testament to the dislikes that while you loved them for it, are now a benefit you no longer need to succumb to. Perhaps you hated the fact he was never willing to choose you over his fraternity or you always pretended you enjoyed the tv shows you loved, when in reality you hated it.
No More Compromising Your Interests
Remember all those times you found yourself at events you didn’t enjoy or pretending to like his favorite band? Relationships come with compromise, but sometimes, it goes too far, pulling you away from your own interests. Now, you have the chance to reclaim your time and invest it in things you love, without any pressure. Want to revisit the bookstore you skipped or dive back into that niche hobby you set aside? Now’s the perfect time.
You’re Free from His Bad Habits
Every person has quirks, but some habits can be harder to overlook. Maybe he had an irritating way of never putting the dishes away or a tendency to constantly check his phone. Without him, you’re free from those day-to-day annoyances that often become bigger than they initially seem. Relish the peace and harmony of your space as you let go of things that once grated on your nerves. It’s important to note that there will be constant reminders of him. Whether it’s sightings of him at a downtown bar or alerts from your friends that he was seen on campus, each reminder is just a fleeting moment. You have the power to let the feeling pass without letting it disrupt your peace or progress.
Focusing on Your Goals, Not “Our” Goals
In relationships, personal dreams sometimes merge to fit the couple’s vision. But what if some of his ambitions didn’t align with yours? Perhaps your gut told you that moving to an uninterested city as he pursues finance was a bad idea. Breaking up can be an opportunity to revisit your dreams, whether it’s starting a new career path, traveling solo, or moving to that city you’ve always loved after graduation.
Saying No to “What’s Next?” Pressure
As you navigate this next chapter, remember that there is beauty in the space now that you don’t talk. Breakups are a natural part of life, and while they can be painful, they’re often an opportunity to grow and flourish. Just as Taylor Swift’s “Now That We Don’t Talk” evokes a mixture of nostalgia and empowerment, your breakup can too. So, rather than lamenting what you’ve lost, celebrate what you’ve gained: the freedom to pursue your own happiness.
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