Hello Single Girls of State –– it is I, Alyssa. I may or may not be part of the club (I choose mystery). I do not really want to speak on it. What I do want to speak on, though, is “Fleabag.” So, let’s do it! (spoilers ahead).
Over the weekend, me and my roommate (and her boyfriend, this was his hazing) watched both seasons of “Fleabag” in one day. I had already watched “Fleabag” back my freshman year, but following my (alleged) breakup I thought, “Wow, I really need a show that makes me want scream into the void,” so naturally, I forced them to watch it with me.
Where do I begin? I truly believe “Fleabag” is perfection in so many ways — from the writing, the pace, the fourth-wall breaks, Hot Priest and all the character dynamics that are so raw, human and achingly painful. Everything is so intentional. The blend of satirical humor and emotion makes this show so special to me. I will not say that I am Fleabag because we are quite the opposite personality-wise, but it is utterly refreshing to see a complex female character being portrayed in equally as complex familial and relationship dynamics.
Fleabag’s trauma and deep-rooted issues truly affect every corner of her life, especially in the way they influence her perception of love, family and herself — which is just so real. The way that Fleabag self-sabotages truly makes you look inward — like damn, is that me? Maybe that’s the point — I mean she quite literally speaks to us. I really felt special. In a way, it is almost validating to see her break the fourth-wall, because inside a woman’s mind is a camera that follows her around constantly. If you know, you know.
The seamless transition between seasons one and two is beautiful as well because here we have season one, where Fleabag shows us she thinks she is unloveable, her sins unforgivable — we continue to see her make choices that are morally dubious — and yet you feel her pain and grief intertwine inside her. Season two shows us she is lovable, she has always been able to give and receive love, and that redemption is always around the corner. Even though Fleabag is an unreliable narrator, there are no clear-cut villains in the show (except maybe her stepmother) and despite all her flaws presented to us on a plate, you can understand exactly where she is healing from.
“I love you.” “It’ll pass.”
While everyone goes crazy over the Hot Priest storyline, I appreciate it more for the fact that he existed not to forgive her sins, but to be a piece of vulnerability during a time that Fleabag is healing from season one’s actions. I mean, he is the only person who notices her talking to the camera –– “Where do you go?” he asks.
It was the work she put into herself that made it possible to happen –– for them to love each other. Loving a priest all people is quite ironic, but don’t worry, it’s because he is a cool priest with a lot of baggage.
The ending itself was an act of love, on both their parts. When Fleabag asks him, “It’s God isn’t it?” she already knew it was the beginning to the end. Did it matter? No. Not all.
While the last scene of the show is gut-wrenching, it is not as gut-wrenching as seeing Fleabag break down in the confessional booth admitting her biggest desires (“Kneel”), not as gut-wrenching as “I don’t know what to do with it, all that love I have for her,” and not as gut-wrenching as watching Fleabag destroy herself to fill the void of her pain. Hot Priest is the antithesis of it all. It was never about him as much as her.
In my opinion, the ending was perfect, and as Fleabag no longer needs to break the fourth-wall anymore and look toward us anymore, we now know she finally broke the cycle.
If I am ever going to recommend a show to you, it will be of high-worth. Right now, I think “Fleabag” and “Normal People” are my highest contenders of shows that I will accept no criticism on. “Normal People,” I fear you may be next for an article.
Well, that’s all I have. Watch “Fleabag” for me, please!
XOXO,
Alyssa
