Even for those who are not hopeless romantics, romantic love is a beautiful thing to desire. Yet stay weary. Chasing it can make one blind to the gift of singlehood — a gift that is extra special for women.
For the Women Who Came Before Us
To be born in this generation is a great blessing for a woman who is grounded in her truth and her dreams. While societies throughout human history have varied in their views of women and their roles, the modern era generally views women as capable of independence. This view is empowering and can allow one to live their singlehood with grace.
Centuries of women in certain societies before us were devoid of the chance to be single and even some women and girls today. They lived with their parents until married off or until they found a future husband. Any personal development was made within the confines of highly influential and binding relationships. While many women definitely still lived fulfilling and authentic lives, forceful opinions by those close to them and social practices limited women or at least posed a greater challenge to what they could do.
With Grace and Gratitude
You, however, have been handed your independence by the fact that you can even be “single”. If you choose love, you can do it on your timeline and with whom you want (hopefully). There are probably countless women in the history of humanity who dreamt of such a thing. Women were told who they were to be and what they were to do.
Being single can be the easiest way to know yourself. It is an honest opportunity to be “self-centered.” If being single is ever a point of sadness or frustration, think of the women who never had that but wished they did. It is human to forget about all we have, so it is important to remind ourselves.
Swept by Hormones
“Wish I was a Single Girl Again” is the title of a song off Tia Blake’s 1972 album, “Folksongs and Ballads.” The song cycles a wish to be a single girl between reminiscing on life single and now married. In the end, Blake writes that when you get swept off your feet, then you will no longer wish to be a single girl. In true nature, falling in love can be a whirl of emotions, but sometimes it is just that. One then ends up married and wishes to be single.
Woman with a Brain
Take the reins of your “singlehood.” Understand who you are and who you want to be and find security in it. That way when you look for love, you can find something that serves you and is actually compatible with you and your life. Dream of you. Then dream of your partner.
A fitting quote resurfaced on the internet by the Downton Abbey character Violet Crawley.
“You’re a woman with a brain and reasonable ability… stop whining and find something to do!”
Violet Crawley
VALLEY must certainly agree. So, open yourself to romantic love if that calls. Just remember that what you have right now is special too.
What do you love about being single? Let us know on Instagram @VALLEYmag!
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